Lucy's mad dental skills...

Lucy pulled Jesse's first loose front tooth out last night. That thing had been dangling by a thread of skin for a week and was gnarly!  He was Hillbilly all.the.way! James and I had both tried several times to pull it out and Jesse was constantly messing with it to no avail. Yet, last night, Lucy reached in there and twisted it right out off his gums and out of his mouth like a pro. I was half joking when I suggested that she and Preslie take a go at trying to pull it out while I was tucking them all in. I thought they'd be as grossed out as Shelby was at the idea. Nope. Lucy seriously grabbed hold of it with her tiny little fingers and twisted until it came out...lots of bleeding ensued, but it was worth it and we all got a huge laugh out of the situation. {Repeat tuck-in-routine because everyone was too riled up to sleep afterward...so worth it!} What a memory!

epiphany...

My epiphany will probably be a "duh" to some and "huh?" to others...aren't all epiphanies like that? My hope is that when my children are adults raising children of their own and they read back over our family blog from when they were tiny this little (BIG) epiphany of mine is a major "duh" for them because they will have been practicing it their entire lives and naturally raise their children this way.

We will not hide these truths from our children;
we will tell the next generation
about the glorious deeds of the Lord,
about his power and his mighty wonders.
For he issued his laws to Jacob;
he gave his instructions to Israel.
He commanded our ancestors
to teach them to their children,
so the next generation might know them—
even the children not yet born—
and they in turn will teach their own children.
So each generation should set its hope anew on God,
not forgetting his glorious miracles
and obeying his commands.
Then they will not be like their ancestors—
stubborn, rebellious, and unfaithful,
refusing to give their hearts to God.

Psalm 78: 4-8

When you are elbow deep in diapers, laundry, tuck-in and get up routines, obedience training and just getting through the day, it is difficult to maintain the proper focus as a parent. So, we buy books...lots and lots of books and take parenting bible studies, and go to MOPS to gain wisdom from other moms, and read Mommy blogs to feel like we are not alone and we scramble to gain little truths and tricks of the trade that will help us in our overwhelming task of raising perfect children. We all say that we don't want our kids to be perfect, but really what we spend most of time and energy doing is training them to be polite, obedient and not embarrass us in public. All of these are important things...especially when they are preschoolers. But, there comes a time and we have beyond entered it with our almost 9 year old when we have to stop and ask ourselves, "Who does God want this child to become and how can we create the best possible atmosphere for her to meet Jesus in our home and experience her faith now and as she grows into adulthood?" and "How can we communicate to her that she wasn't just "saved from hell" or "saved for Heaven," when she received salvation?  But, she was saved FOR a life of being Jesus' hands and feet here on earth...24-7...in body and in spirit...living out the Gospel message...bringing hope to the hopeless, friendship to the lonely, food to the hungry, shelter for the homeless, healing to the broken and sick...truth to the lost and confused...

We don't want to spend the 18 years we have them at home teaching them to be nice, have good manners, maintain a good reputation, get a good education, make a lot of money and make a name for themselves.

What a waste, if that is all we do.  We are called to make disciples (not robots) and that starts at home.

I have always been passionate about this topic of discipling my children, but I was headed in the wrong direction.

(The direction of good behavior and attracting people to Christ...not BEING Christ to them)

Over the past 3 years God has caused me to take a U-Turn in my thinking and this new direction is taking root more and more lately as I am being reminded by Him daily the reason for my own Salvation. I am saved FOR Him and to glorify him in all I do. My hands, feet and entire body belong to Him and if I do not use them to teach and serve others, I am slapping Him in the face.

I am reading One Million Arrows right now and it is all about Raising Your Children to Change the World.  Can you tell I am inspired?

Do you ever wish you'd have knocked on wood?

I am superstitious. I know, I know Christians have no reason to be superstitious, but sometimes I am. Yesterday, I was so high on our first day of school...energized, excited! And, today has been one big Flopirooni so far!

It is my birthday, 38th to be exact. We got up in great moods. Did our family tradition of birthday morning breakfast out in our jammies, modified because James has to be at work so early. But we did go through the Mcdonalds' drive-thru and take our breakfast to the church to eat together. That was fun.

It was in the van on the way home that it started to go downhill. "We're not doing school today, right? What?! It is your birthday. We shouldn't have to do school on your birthday. This is the worst day ever..."on and on. Yeah, welcome to the second day of school. We did, in fact start school with much wailing and gnashing of teeth and were making some progress until the Littles tried to join us at the table where they were not well-received by the Bigs. "Go away! You are distracting us. I can't work with you that close to me. Get out of here..."on and on...once again. I had had it at that point. I sent the Bigs to their room for quite a while to get over their stinky attitudes and I put away all of the school materials. I am done for today. This is going to have to be a fresh start kind of thing, because my attitude isn't even where it needs to be in order to get them in line today. I will blow my top and school will be miserable.

I guess I should have predicted it. I mean, when we start the second day of school with McDonalds at the church and try to redirect to school that they already aren't in the habit of, I am kind of setting them and myself up for failure.

Maybe if I would've knocked on wood it would've turned out differently.  Doubt it.

Happy Birthday to me anyway.

I bought this gem the other day at the thrift store...It makes me happy. It makes me want to have another baby girl and name her Suzy. And she will love homeschool everyday and be a perfect, darling, pleasant little angel. I will read it and let her take me to my happy place...I might even share it with the Bigs and Littles if they are lucky!

Aren't the illustrations so sweet? And this is only half the book.

First day of school....chaos...our new routine (kind of)...

Mommy bloggers all know this fact, but readers may not. Sometimes the cool things we post are the only cool things we do all week or maybe even all month, so it isn't like I am always inspired with my apron on, muffins in the oven, chalk in hand, Mozart playing in the background, and good book to read aloud. Much of what we experience is organized chaos...not unlike the real classroom, I might add after being a teacher for 6+ years.  But this morning {even though I had to be at a MOPS steering team meeting at 10:30} we got down to some first day of school business. I was pretty impressed with myself, even though we didn't get through all of the days assignments yet. As soon as I am finished posting this we will.

Up at 5:40 to walk with Jeka...arrived home at 6:55 to 3 awake chillins already milling around and begging for breakfast...So after praying over the day with Jeka and Lucy, we moved on to food and literature.  Our new school year morning routine will not begin in our jammies at the table like it always has in the past. The kiddos will have to complete their morning routines before being served breakfast, but today we started off slow. 

Whilst they ate their breakfast, I read to them from the above book I found on Saturday at a thrift store. It is a cool little book published in 1958 about Christian children who dared to live out their faith. I was totally moved by the first story about a young boy named Alfred who longed to be a hunter and ride horses as a trade, but was called to transcribe the first Anglo Saxon version of the Gospel of John. As Venerable Bede read the very last sentence of the book for him to transcribe, Alfred said, "There, it is finished now," to which Venerable Bede replied, "You speak the truth, all is finished now," and he began to sing a hymn...as he sang the last word of the hymn he breathed his last breath and slipped into the presence of the Lord. From that point forward, Alfred no longer dreamed of being a hunter. He had seen a man struggle with his last breath to translate the Bible. Because of that, he resolved to spend the rest of his life making copies of it. Those are the stories of history I want my kiddos to learn about. Yes, all of history is important, but as much as it depends on me, they will learn about the history of the heroes of our faith right along with the world history presented to them in traditional history books.  Will they remember this story I read to them over their oatmeal and frosted mini-wheats? Who knows, but I am sure that at least a few of these stories will inspire them from time to time. I want them to know that they don't have to wait until they are adults to be bold with their faith.

Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity. 1 Timothy 4:12

So, here are Shelby and Jesse's morning routine checklists that they must complete before being fed.

 “The one who is unwilling to work shall not eat.” 2 Thessalonians 3:10b 

(We happen to agree with Dave Ramsey that requiring children to do their part around the house prepares them to be a team player and family member as well a productive citizen. They need to earn their keep so to speak. Kids who have no chores around the house are being trained for welfare...
think about it.)

You will notice that Jesse marked through "dust stairs" because he says it takes way too long. However, after 20 minutes in his room to think about it, he did dust them today and we are in negotiations about it for the future. This is the dustiest house we have ever lived in and if we don't dust daily, we have an inch thick on everything within a week. No joke. The two littles have their routines too, but no checklists since they can't read. I am going to make them ones with pictures like Shelby and Jesse used to have.

And, here is our weekly skeleton basic school schedule checklist.These are the core things that will get done every week and we will have other art projects, field trips, science experiments, guest speakers and all kinds of real world experiences in addition to the basics. Believe it or not, we are able to complete the skeleton schedule in about 2 hours on a perfect day with no interruptions. If we are home, we are always able to finish before lunch. even though we had to be at church at 10:30 today, Shelby finished 3/4 of her assignments. Jesse chose to do them all this afternoon, so here we go.
This year, James will be teaching them on Wednesday mornings while I run the OAC from 6am to noon and help lead a yoga/pilates blend class at 6 am. I am so excited for him to take on more of a role in their education. It has always been the plan, just hasn't happened on a consistent basis because of his crazy schedule. Now, this IS the schedule, so it WILL happen. SO excited! I was feeling rather uninspired until today. I actually feel like we can make this thing work now...and more than work.

If you stopped by today, please say a prayer for our homeschool year. We are praying for all of you as your children embark on a new school year, whether at home or in a public or private school. We parents and grandparents need to support one another and lift each other up in prayer because we are ALL doing our very best to provide THE very best for our children and we all have to make tough decisions and trust that God is in control no matter where our kids go to school.

Jesse said you all were adopting a baby...

Last week, I had one of the worst bladder infections I've had in a long time. Thought it was another IC flare up at first, but as it got worse and worse, I finally went to the doctor where it was confirmed as some really rare strain of bacteria. {I'm sure I got from the ghetto water park we went to on Friday} [side note: Jenn and I both got a nasty flu-like virus the day after we went to that same waterpark a few weeks ago...coincidence, I think not.] It started last Saturday night and I couldn't even get out of bed on Sunday. I slept for 24 hours straight getting up only long enough to take some pain meds and eat something. My mom was so worried about me that she surprised me by coming into town to help take care of me and the kiddos. She was a God-send because I went to see the doctor on Tuesday morning and I would have had to lug all 4 kids with me if she weren't here. I love my Momma.

All that to say, when your Mom spends a lot of time with your kids without you around, there's no telling what kind of stuff they might tell her that you'll have to explain later. This time it was, "Jesse said you all were going to adopt a baby." Kids are such concrete thinkers. When we talk about or pray about the future and God's will for our family, the kids sometimes assume it's just gonna happen. Their faith is so pure and God has proven faithful to them already over and over in their short lives so far. Why would they doubt? We prayed that God would bring Shelby and Jesse a baby sister for over a year...& He did. We prayed for God to take care of us and make sure we never went without food to eat or a roof over our heads when we were in Arizona...He did. We prayed that God would move us back to Oklahoma or Kansas...and He did. We prayed God would lead Daddy back into ministry...He did. As a family we have prayed for countless other miracles {too personal to mention}to happen in our family or friends' lives and seen answers to those prayers as well. 

God answers prayers. We know that and the kids know that. His answers are Yes, No, or Wait. God's given the Ls a lot of "Wait" answers. We are an impatient bunch and he is growing us in that area.

So back to, "Jesse said you all were adopting a baby." Our prayer for the past several months has been for God to reveal to us whether or not it is in His plan for us to adopt. We have started no processes toward adoption, although, at least a few times a month I get adoption blog obsessed. Shelby and I both do. James waffles and truth be told, I do too at this point.  But one thing we do know is that we love children and we love having a big family...and that is not super common these days, so if we have extra love to give and a passion for raising kids, doesn't that mean that God might have at least one or two more in mind for us.

A Mom once told me that "you just know when your family is complete...God gives you a peace about it." Well, if that is true, my family is not complete. But really,the more I search scripture, the less I buy into this whole idea about "God just giving us a peace about the right answer." He opens and closes doors, and makes it pretty clear how we are supposed to live in His Holy Book. There is only one scripture I can think of off the top of my head that talks about Him giving us a peace in a difficult situation and that peace isn't about a decision to make...He says, "Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.  And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." What this scripture says to me is that if you pray, trust God and you have a thankful heart, whatever He brings into your life will not shake you...He will give you peace with whatever plans He has for you.

We humans make so many plans based on our emotions and sometimes we leave no room for God to direct our paths.  If I were to choose to adopt right now based on my emotions, I'd adopt 5 or 10 kids, some with special needs. Now the other extreme are those out there that are totally closed off to God numbering their children and they are so emotionally spent with the 1 or 2 they have that they refuse to entertain the idea that God might just have a few more children waiting for them.

Where we are at right now is the "waiting mode," we are waffling and since we haven't taken the leap to contact an agency or anything we are basically telling God that if He has a child for us He needs to make it very clear...bring the child to us. Collide our paths with a mother looking for a family, or confirm in some other way that adoption is His plan for us. So, that is what I told my Mom when she asked me if what Jesse said was true. We are praying about it, but we are making no plans right now.

This morning in bible study we were focusing on Psalm 67, but I kept being drawn over to Psalm 68:5-6 on the next page.  I had underlined it and circled it long ago in my bible and I love it.

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows,
is God in his holy dwelling.
God sets the lonely in families,   he leads out the prisoners with singing;
but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.

I love the entire passage, but "He sets the lonely in families" has always stood out to me.
He sets the lonely in families...sometimes it happens through marriage, God gives a lonely man a wife whose family embraces him as their own son...sometimes through a lonely teenager's best friend's parents, she feels the warmth of a family for the first time...it happens in church families all the time, a lonesome stranger wanders in and becomes a part of God's holy family. And, it happens through adoption.  As I try to find statistics on how many orphans there are worldwide the numbers vary, but they are all in the hundreds of millions.  How can we not at least CONSIDER or PRAY about the possibility that one of those orphans is our son or daughter? How can YOU? 

uninspired lately, so let's show my hippie decor...judge me if you must.

Here is our plethora of thrifted glory and other collectibles. My sister calls me an old lady for all my nick knacks, but I love each and every one.

This cabinet in our kitchen makes me happy every morning when I reach for a cup for my java. And the willow creek girl with open arms from Carrie giving me her blessing to move on...even though she knew in her heart it would be so so hard for me.

I know, I know Pee Wee is creepy, but at least he isn't in the shower like he was in our house in AZ, right, Helen? He keeps time for us...He really needs to reset that clock. My Harmony Kingdom Animal boxes are my little tiny treasures. I adore them and will pass them down to my littles one day. Right now, they store guitar picks and other small treasures for the kids to discover.

 This man is a candle, believe it or not. He was thrifted also, and I love the emotion, the agony and desperation in his face. I had to have him. Behind him sits a box my friend, Cindy, gave me when we had a miscarriage in 2003.  She knew the pain of miscarriage and gave me the box to keep any notes, cards, ultrasounds, etc, that would remind me of that sweet little soul waiting to meet me in heaven.

Our Mara mugs...so beautiful and they support such a worthy cause. We collect and adore her pottery.

Can you say "cheesy early 90's engagement picture?" We laugh at this pic all the time. James looks just like Pee Wee Herman (why we like Pee wee) and I am about 30 pounds overweight. He loved me anyway. That is true-love! My mom got me the Kelly Rae Roberts girl that says, "Tell Your Story," because she knows how important it is for me to share my story. If I can help one person see Christ or avoid the mistakes I have made, it is worth it! The "world's greatest mom and dad" were our gifts this year from the littles for mother's and father's day...thrifted, of course.

My Mom collects clowns, which we all think is a little creepy, but we found these at an thrift store in Grove years ago and could not resist.  They adorn the hallway between our bath and bedroom. NO, they are not for sale.

And, for our multi-tasking, master bedroom door.  {who does this kind of thing?}We have our school calendar up there to conserve space and we decorated above the doors with Jesse's portraits of us. Genius!

Another Hope Thrift Store find...Man, I love that place.

I think these are coasters stuck to a velvet background. What? Who? Great idea!

Where we spend most of our time...eating, learning, computing, playing games, talking...the dining room.  Don't be jealous of James' dog portraits. He started collecting them and Bombay Company discontinued selling them. Losers!

More dining, different angle. Picture the table and chairs turquiose distressed...because one of these days they will be. I promise.

Our chalkboard with a frame around it is where we write the scripture of the week.  This year, we have decided to memorize all of the scriptures on the Seeds family Worship cds. Starting with Seeds of Courage.  We did ABC scriptures, ABC Proverbs and ABC Psalms and now I am taking it easy with a lot of the songs they already know. Hiding it in their hearts and ours. Love those seeds.

Aha...now for the bookshelves in our dining (school) room that need some serious organizing.  Rachel, get your bootay over her and do your magic! I am a half ready for school to start and half ready to enroll Shelby and Jesse in public school. I know once I get started, and with James help {he is teaching on Wednesdays while I work for him at the OAC} I will enjoy it again, but this is the first year I am dreading it a little bit. Maybe it is because it is the first year we didn't school year round and some attitudes have popped up. Maybe I have gotten a taste of working at the OAC and I like the adult interaction.  Who knows, but I will give it my best...my heart and soul...and with God's help, this will be a successful school year. Really, it will. I believe that with my whole heart.

I think the sign says it all.  Bring us some Millstone French Roast and we're all good.  Seriously, we dig drop in visitors as long as you can handle the chaotic environment sometimes. ; )

We're all about sharing the love!

Lucy Lou, I can always count on you...

To crack me up and make me smile even on the grouchiest days. That's why your song, "you are my sunshine," is so perfect for you. You really do make us happy when skies are grey. Today, we were waiting for Daddy to get home so we could go swimming and of course everyone had to put their suits on first thing this morning and wear them all day in anticipation. well, Lucy's tag on her suit was bothering her, so she kept taking it off. And...I kept chasing her around putting it back on and giving her the choice to wear something else until it was time to go, but NO, she would put the suit on, just to take it off again moments later. Then, she'd hide from me...Here is where I found her this time:

Not very sanitary for the old play kitchen, huh? She is such a pistol. What am I gonna do with her?

Just keep to yourself...

Do you ever have one of those weeks when it is probably better if you keep to yourself as much as possible? In the book Homeschooling with a Meek and Quiet Spirit, the author suggests that if we are feeling hormonal, sick, or just having an off day (week) we should minimize our conversations as much as possible and try to avoid any situations that might be volatile. This has been one of those weeks. I have had an IC flare-up all week and because of the side effects of the medication I have to take I have been irritable...more than irritable, down right grouchy. I hate feeling this way. I haven't returned a few phone calls or emails because I feel like anything that comes out of my mouth or through my finger tips could turn to yuck real quick if I am not careful. Dealing with chronic pain is difficult for anyone, but people who already have a tongue control issue may experience a tiny bit more difficulty as the way they treat people when they are in pain does not invite sympathy or an eagerness to help out. I am one of those people. I give my tongue to God over and over in a day and then snatch it back and use it as a whip when I am hurting. I feel like I have grown over the years and gotten better and better, but there are times like this week when I fail.fail.and fail again. I am so thankful for grace because I need a lot of it.

class reunions are interesting...

When we are in high school, we pretty much run on emotion. Every little event, excitement, hurt, break-up, harsh word, feeling of being on top of the world or left out of the crowd is magnified and burned into our tiny little brains. So, getting together 20 years later with the people that we shared this formative time with is a little bit surreal. How can just being in close proximity with these people bring back so many memories and emotions? All of the sudden, you look at that time differently than you did at the 10 year when you were still hanging with your clique and trying to figure out why this or that friend hasn't married yet. You look at your classmates as human beings with their own full lives and families with little replicas of themselves. All of the sudden you feel regrets for things you forgot you had said or done 20 years ago until you see the humanity in their aging faces. Your stage in life is also  magnified when you see that many of your friends have kids in high school or they have gone fully grey or bald.  We are almost 40. It is a fact.  2 years and 2 weeks from now I will have my 40th birthday. I remember when 30 was old. I don't feel old...except for every morning when I get out of bed. I still have a young mind and that girl who graduated 20 years ago is still in there. Boy has she changed, but aspects of her remain the same.

I am thankful for the friendships that we are purposeful about cultivating and nurturing and I look forward to rekindling some friendships that have fizzled since moving away all those years ago.

I am also looking forward to getting all of our kids together now that we are back in

Oklahoma and watching them interact.

Who will become instant friends? Remain close? Tell each other stories we have each passed down about high school and crack up at their old parents who thought they were so cool?

There were some friends missing. My bff Colbi couldn't come.

We'd have had so much fun. I am forcing her to come to our 25th!

Obviously, I need to go out there and order these, and I will, but my impatience says go ahead and post with the "proof" right across the middle and replace later.

Good times...good times.

my girls lately...

 Miss P sure is growing up! Shelby asked me if she could straighten Preslie's hair this morning and since I am elbow deep in school planning, I said, "Sure, just be careful!" Here is the result. Baby P not looking so babyish any more. My two blond haired blue-eyed children amaze me.
Jesse and Preslie look so much alike and so much like my brother and James' little sister, Janell.

Nothing like me and James with our dark hair and hazel eyes, although,
we both had much lighter hair when we were babies.

So fun to see more and more resemblances as each of them grow!

A few weeks ago, we straightened Lucy's hair again because she wanted to look like Jeka that day. She looks like a totally different girl with straight hair! Crazy! In the middle pic she looks a lot like the big permed hair Jeanna from high school. no? And no, at 3 years old, she does not have a perm. It is natural...beautiful...unique...and maddening to brush and take care of. Who'd perm a 3 yo's hair anyway? Pageant moms, maybe?

When the Wiltses were here a few weeks ago, the girls played wedding, a favorite around here. If it isn't obvious, Kenna is the bride and the others are bridesmaids. Shelby towered over the bride, but that is okay, right? Beautiful girls!

How do the littles sleep like this?

I know I just posted about how sweet it is that the girls can snuggle in their big-girl beds together, so I had to crack up when I went to check on them and found this sleeping arrangement.

They really didn't seem to mind, just snoozing away like that, but I after snapping a few photos I did rearrange them and cover them back up.

This is the very reason that Jesse Dean is the only one who gets to sleep with Mom and Dad if we are somewhere where a child has to bunk with us. He is the only one who will not give us a foot in the face. All of our girls are restless sleepers like their Aunt Jeka, flopping all over the bed and whacking their sleeping buddies with arms, legs and feet.

Reminds me of {this post} when Shelby and Lucy were sleeping in a tangled up mess over a year ago.

Memories. So glad I take the time to capture them because I have never been great at remembering details. This blog is so special to me for that reason and because the kids will have most of their lives documented...from my perspective, of course, but documented none the less. There is rarely a week that goes by without me posting at least a few times. It is so worth it.

20 Years ago...

I can't believe I graduated from high school 20 years ago. It blows my mind. KABOOM.

Seems like yesterday. Yesterday, I tell ya.

1991 was not a great year for fashion. Still, we looked H-O-T! It was a beach party after all.

We had a little too much fun in high school. Probably way too much fun.

Where oh where did all my thick hair go?  That is the only thing I miss about being a teenager. Seriously! And No, I didn't get married in high school. I was a bride in a mock wedding for Family Living class. Matt and Jeka got to be the flower girl and ring bearer and I got to kiss a boy who wasn't my boyfriend. Freaky. I wonder if they even still offer that class. It was so good and kids today need some preparation for marriage and parenting. I learned everything I know from that class. Not, but it really was good.

My reunion is this weekend and I am excited to see how everyone has changed and what little people they have brought into this world. Good times await!

Artwork display...

Loving Lucy's people lately!

She is the upside down one with curly hair.

I must be the 4-armed lady because she perceives me as someone who can multi-task.

Sweet veil blowing in the wind and lace up gloves!



I love the basket detail on Shelby's flower girl.



Shelby's poster for Lucy Lou.

Jesse's sibling heart art. Observe the rays of love shooting out of them.



Shelby made me that cute Get Well poster when I hurt my foot and couldn't walk. It cracks me up that she has me dancing to a boom box. Like I do that every day...or do I?



Best friend scripture art, by Shelby. This is a daily occurrence.

And, finally, Mom and Dad as hearts for their 14th anniversary by Jesse Dean.

Woot!