Yesterday, as I sat in the dentist's chair waiting to get a crown, I shared with the technician that I would have rather been in labor and deliver a baby naturally than sit there and have them work on my mouth. It is quite embarrassing to be 37 years old and afraid to go to the dentist. I don't know when my fear of the dentist began, but it has gotten to the point that I seriously almost have a panic attack when the doctor pulls out the needle or starts drilling. I get light-headed and have trouble breathing. I have to use what I learned in labor and focus on deep belly breaths, while reciting Philippians 4:13.
"I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me...I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me..."
I think the biggest thing I am afraid of is that nerve pain that sometimes comes while they are drilling...the same type of unrelenting pain I remember having when I got dry sockets after getting my wisdom teeth out. That is the worst pain I have felt in my life. Labor and pushing a baby out times 10 and that is how I remember it. I imagine that that is what it feels like when you have to get a root canal, and many times getting a crown leads to a root canal, so I was freaking out.
What made it worse and better at the same time was the radio station that was playing in the office...Cirrus Love Songs. So at one point, the long version of "Tonight I Celebrate my Love for You" was playing. I am sitting in the chair with two sets of hands in my mouth, one of which was drilling on my upper back left tooth, while these lyrics BLARED above me.
Tonight I celebrate my love for you
It seems the natural thing to do
Tonight no one's gonna find us
We'll leave the world behind us
When I make love to you
Tonight I celebrate my love for you
And hope that deep inside you feel it too
Tonight our spirits will be climbing
To the sky lit up with diamonds
When I make love to you tonight
Tonight I celebrate my love for you (ooh)
And that midnight song is gonna come shining through
Tonight there'll be no distance between us
What I want most to do
Is to get close to you tonight
Tonight I celebrate my love for you
And soon this old world will seem brand new
Tonight we will both discover
How friends turn into lovers
When I make love to you
Tonight I celebrate my love for you (ooh)
And that midnight song is gonna come shining through
Tonight there'll be no distance between us
What I want most to do
Is to get close to you
Tonight I celebrate my love for you
AWKWARD! Yet, it did give me something to distract me and it made me wonder why people don't write love songs any more.
{Not icky ones like that, but real [make you cry and think about your love] ones.}
I think that is why I like country music so much because it is the only genre that still has true, telling a story and not trying to be artsy and abstract, love songs. Or, maybe I am just totally out of touch and there are new love songs being written everyday, I just don't know where to find them. I will have to ask my more culturally minded hip friends.
Speaking of love, I am so thankful for my sweetheart husband who got up early with me yesterday to "support me." I hadn't gotten much sleep the night before and I woke up early unable to go back to sleep. I was downstairs making coffee when my, usually sleeps until the last minute, husband came down into the kitchen and scooped me up in his arms saying that he wanted to get up and come down to "support me" on this rough morning when I had to face my fears and go to the dreaded dentist. He usually makes fun of me over issues like this...as do I for him (our love language is sarcasm)...but this time he knew I needed a little something different. I melted into his arms while I choked back tears realizing how silly I was being, but how much my man loves me despite my idiosyncrasies.
But anyway, my advice for the day to myself and my kids is "TAKE CARE of YOUR TEETH" so you won't have to sit in the chair of torture ever again. No, I won't really transfer my fear of the dentist to them, but you can bet I will be monitoring their brushing and flossing more carefully.
